“Just when you think you’ve surrendered, surrender some more”
I have a million post ideas going through my mind right now: suicide prevention week, my almost finished yoga nidra post, 9/11 and world peace, etc. However, this is what I am called to write about today: surrendering.
To be honest I am having a really difficult time right now and it takes a lot to admit that. I’ve been begging for a sign to guide me on a lot of issues I am having and it’s almost like I’m too caught up in the melodrama to stop, look & listen. My energy is not matching what I am expecting and it’s frustrating because I know better than to get stuck in this mind virus.
Over the summer, I have had one hell of an experience being a part of an intensive training with my idol, Gabby Bernstein, and became part of this super loving support group of about two thousand people. This morning I broke down. Literally, like 2 hours after being awake and I turned to my group. I posted everything going on personally and the responses I’ve received were so overwhelmingly loving. One comment that stood out came from a stranger, “Remember, once you think you’ve surrendered, surrender some more!”
Do you know how many times I have heard this? Today I needed to hear it again. This has been my life motto. I believe in this so hard I literally have Ishvara Pranidhana tattooed on my side boob area which of course in English means surrender and devotion in short.
Surrendering isn’t to be mistaken for giving up. Surrendering means you wake up everyday and say “show me how I can serve” and you keep fighting forward towards that light no matter what gets thrown at you. You get out of your own way and remember it’s not about you. You believe with your whole heart that you are being supported even when it’s not very clear.
Sometimes the signs you are looking for are right in front of you (or in my case, tattooed on my body) and other times you just aren’t ready for them and keep yourself from seeking them. Sometimes you have to have that breakdown moment because that is what it takes to 1. surrender, 2. listen and 3. realize you have no control over your path, and you just have trust everything is working out better than you can imagine. Sometimes the craziest things happen when you just let go and decide to stop fighting against the world.
This plays into the law of attraction and your vibration. How do you think the universe is going to treat you when you constantly have trust issues and are blaming “life” for giving you shitty situations? The universe is going to mimic your energy: If you think it is treating you unfair it is going to continue to be “unfair” to you because that’s exactly what you’re telling it to do. “I don’t have enough” “I’m not good enough” “I don’t have time” are all examples of things you could be manifesting without realizing it. Because I’m not perfect, I fall into this trap sometimes like I did this morning.
Luckily this showed me I have more work to do because I am human. Quick fixes included meditation and referring back to mantras I use like: “Obstacles are detours in the right direction” and “Even though I have these obstacles, I love and accept myself anyway.”
Things might not go as I have planned (virgo problems…) but luckily I know damn well there must be a better plan for me then. This life has been full of miracles and opportunities I could not have even dreamed of, that’s why I would never turn my back now. I know how guided and supported I have been in the toughest of times, and my story is still shaping me into the strongest I can be.